The Prophets
I was a bad child
They told me so
and so it was I stole
the candy bar
from Teacher’s desk
I etched the bully’s
initials into the new paint
I fired the rifle
****************inside I rolled
a boulder onto the tracks
I hucked rocks at highway drivers
each time I cursed an angel
lost its wings so I cursed and cursed
********and took the carving knife
********to my arm
jesus rode by on his high cross
********and slapped me
********on the other cheek
****he had holes
****************in his hands
****************to reduce wind resistance
********Teacher took the broomstick
to my knees during mass I ate the flesh
****************and swallowed
********************************blood it burned
my tongue I wanted to flush
the bad out I downed
************************the dish of holy water
in which the Parishioners dipped their fingers
********and came down with the flu
********************************I wanted someone
********to see me so I ran
********around the classroom
************************during math and pushed
************************everyone’s books
off the desks
****************Teacher locked me
************************in the supply closet
**************************************** with a life-sized model
of a man’s
********skeleton and a paper
************************cutter with a blade
************************big as my arm
****************************************slices of blue fell
****************************************through the fan blades
************************in the ceiling vent
********************************I could hear the Other Children
****************laughing across
************************the playground I told god
********************************************************to go fuck himself
I dared him
************************to kill me I begged him
************************************************to kill me
****************on the football field
****************************************in front of the Other Boys that
********would show them
************************I lay in the driveway and begged
satan to take me
****************************************after I killed
god my grandmother
********************************died I couldn’t cry
at the funeral because
I was a bad child
They told me
********so it was
************************I wore the wrong
********************************shirt to school
********************************************************I wore the shirt with
********flowing
********************************sleeves that felt
************************************************like two classy
***********************************************************************black
************************dinner dresses so
************************They made me change
********************************************************before class
******************************** I smoked a joint
behind the dumpster the classroom
****************************************************************went liquid
************************I had to excuse myself I ran
************************to the boys’ room to puke I carved
an anarchy symbol into my calf
********************************and dressed it with black ink
I sold crystal meth
******** to the Rich Kids at Youth Group they
took turns snorting it
****************off their bibles in the church basement
I stared at the sky for a long time I fell
********asleep in the grass
********I etched my new name into
the park bench I lit the park
********restroom on fire The Cops
****************drove around
****************with spotlights my Parents
********wanted me home I couldn’t go
home I needed to keep
Myself separate
****************somehow
I was a bad child
***
Derek Annis is the author of Neighborhood of Gray Houses (Lost Horse Press), the associate director of Willow Springs Books, and the manager of Lynx House Press’ Blue Lynx Prize for Poetry. Their poems have appeared in The Account, Colorado Review, Epiphany, The Gettysburg Review, The Missouri Review Online, Poet Lore, Spillway, and Third Coast, among others.